How to Build Meaningful Relationships in Seminary

What makes building meaningful relationships in seminary any different than building relationships in general? Consider that in God’s providence. This is the only time in your life you will consistently be in the same room with a group of people to learn and study theology together. It is not enough to simply study God’s providence in seminary. We must ponder the beauty of God’s providence in bringing us to this moment and with these particular peers.

Of course, you’re being formed by your theological studies, but the professors and their lectures are not the only way you’re being formed. Your classmates are also playing a role in shaping and equipping you for a lifetime of ministry. Seminary is the ideal training ground for you to go into the local church and equip church members to be theologians, but it requires keen attention both to your studies and to your classmates. Three practices can help you not only gain theological insight but also increase your love and appreciation for your peers.

Ask Questions

What may be considered a “dumb question” is simply an opportunity to open a door to further learning. When you’re considering asking a “dumb question” in class or in smaller groups of study, remember that you aren’t in seminary to show how much you already know but to learn. Learning requires acknowledging what you do not know, even the thing you have had to ask about several times. A posture of learning keeps you humble, and it typically helps those around you.

Studying With Others Can Help You to Build Relationships

How many times have you “studied” with people? Often, the plan is to keep the conversation short and the studying long. It typically goes the opposite way. Consider, however, with a little discipline, what studying with others can do when you’re reviewing course material, preparing for an exam, and encouraging one another.

You may be asking, “Why study together when you can study alone efficiently?” First, it is often in the quiet moments that people can observe your real life. What are you like when doing regular daily tasks? Are you interruptible? How you respond when interrupted reveals who you really are. Discipling is happening as people observe your mundane life, and you observe theirs.

Your Classmates Are Not Your Competition

Second, having a conversation partner enhances knowledge and your relationship with them. In an environment like seminary, it is important to remind yourself that your classmates have something to teach you. Further, they are brothers and sisters in Christ and co-laborers in ministry (1 Cor. 3:1-15). They are not your competition.

Build Relationships In Seminary By Worshiping Together

Lastly, consider how God wants communities of worship—primarily in the local church but also in seminary. In seminary, you and your peers are equipped to lead a future congregation and believers into worship. All theology should lead to doxology, in which God deepens our bonds of love between one another. A simple question can change your relationship with your classmates. This question is not primarily about new concepts you have learned but about how they stir you to worship.

The most meaningful moments of fellowship with fellow classmates are often those that move you to worship. The prayers offered for each other’s burdens. The worshipful thoughts about the theology you have been learning. The awe of what you get to experience together in theological education. All this is sparked by asking a simple question: “What caused you to worship today?”

In these worshipful conversations, you can experience the fellowship believers share with one another and with God (1 John 1:3–4). If seminary is a place of deep thoughts of God, then it should also be a place of deep fellowship with classmates. If seminary is where knowledge abounds more and more, then love should also abound as well (Phil. 1:9).

If you want a place to build meaningful relationships while in seminary, consider applying to Trinity Evangelical Divinity School. There are a wide variety of student organizations and opportunities to worship with your fellow students. Learn more about student life at TEDS.

Start your application today! Do not hesitate to reach out to an admissions counselor or request more information if you have any questions.